She didn’t grow up wanting to be addicted to heroin. She had self-esteem issues at an early age. She, like many young girls, began dating an older man. And he hit her, which caused more problems than one.
I had a vision for this summer. The summer going into my senior year of college was going to be a great one. Everything I worked for in college would become a reality. I would obtain an internship in NYC with a popular radio company. I would learn more about the radio profession, while living in the city by myself. Aside from being a great chance for me to network and grow in a potential career, I could further grow as a person since I’d be living on my own. I thought I had the internship, in fact I got a call a few weeks ago. During the phone conversation, this person said I would receive a phone call from a show producer by Wednesday. I couldn’t have been happier. Everything looked real. Everything I had hoped and dreamed for was about to become a reality. But you know the saying, there’s no such thing as a sure thing. Wednesday came, and the producer never called. I was a little worried, but I figured he or she had been busy. I emailed the person who had called me just to let her know that the producer never called. That Friday morning I woke up a little late, and I immediately checked my email. I went through each email until I came across the one from the person who called. The person informed me that there were no longer any internship openings. I was crushed… absolutely crushed. How could they do that? I wanted this for so long, and I thought I had it, but it turned out they had other plans. The whole thing infuriated my family and friends. A lot of them told me how I got screwed and everything. It made me realize a lot of things; it gave me a different perspective. I had my mind set on New York City this summer. No longer would I spend the summer working a minimum-wage job 35 hours a week while living at home. The rejection forced me to face the reality of living at home where I didn’t want to be. But you know what, I’ve gained a new, incredible perspective on life. I’m not sure where I’ll be next summer, which makes this summer, potentially my last one at home ever, a big one. I need to hang out with people who I haven’t hung out with since high school, and I also need to meet new people. I need to do new things. I plan on going to different concerts downtown, bars and a special trip to Tennessee for Bonnaroo. I plan on living this summer. I plan on making the best of this situation. You can only control so much. You can control your relationship with others, you can control how hard you work and you can control yourself. That internship in NYC was just a dream. If they gave that internship me, and I moved to NYC I probably would have become complacent with it. I would have been OK with just being an intern. I would have simply put that on my resume, and hope it would land me a job. Having been rejected from that internship has only added fuel to my fire. I’m more motivated and ready than ever. Maybe I just needed this rejection to help me see that dreaming about a better life won’t give you a better life. I have to do something to make my life better, and I plan on living that way this summer.
Boy Meets World has given me great ideals. I’ve learned friendship, love, family values because of that show. Every now and again I’ll put it on my TV and reminisce on the good times. Cory Matthews is that average human being. He has only a few good people in his life (I’m sure he’d have more if it wasn’t a 30-minute sitcom.) He went to an average college. He didn’t play sports (besides for the “B” basketball team during Season 1) and he didn’t have any notable achievements. One picture of Boy Meets World depicts Cory as average better than any situation. The celery picture. Cory grows upset because his sister has a new friend who is a ridiculously talented painter. Cory feels like a failure. He feels like the reason why he is the way he is was because his father never did anything remarkable that his father was OK with being “normal.” As Cory says this, I wonder if we are all just celery?
Tasteless, watery vegetables most commonly used as a sidekick to Buffalo wings.
I think everyone has a calling. I think everyone has something that they do well. Sometimes, though, we either don’t know or fail to acknowledge what we do well–and that is when we feel like celery.
We feel disconnected or uninteresting. We feel broken or lost. We feel outdated or dull.
We feel like failures
And that feeling sucks.
No one has the keys to life. No one knows exactly what words should be said. No one knows everything (although some believe they do.)
That’s why we’re alive. We eat, sleep, drink. We go to school, go to work and hang with friends. We do good things and we do bad things. And bad things happen to good people just as good things happen to bad people. Because none of us have the answers.
Because none of us should have any answers.
The next time you feel like celery remember someone else feels like celery, too.
Because someone feels lost, broken, alone and confused.
But that’s what you’re supposed to feel like sometimes.