Well, 2013 is winding down… Another year has come and gone. It definitely has been a wonderful year. One of my favorites of the 21 I’ve been around for so far. I’ll break down my top-15 moments. Some of these moments will make little sense because they are sometimes inside jokes, especially the moment of the year. But hopefully I’ll do a decent enough job explaining why each moment can be found where it is. This year has been full of drunken memories, Miley Cryus and a semester without Michael John Loffredo. I do love Fredo. He appears on the list. Maybe. The thing about Fredo is, no matter how annoying he might be, I can’t imagine a world without him. He really sucks sometimes, especially when he sent a group message about three pages long saying how everyone was invited to his “new mansion” (yeah the kid said he lives in a mansion.) but overall the kid isn’t that bad. He makes for a fun time.
anyway without further ado, here are the top-15 moments of 2013 (strictly Bonaventure)
15. Mario Party 2
This game changed my life. I’ll be honest. I never had a video game system as a child. I grew up enjoying Sega though. My cousin had one of those in his basement. It was beautiful. But N64 isn’t something I did as a child, so when Matt Moretti introduced trippy townhouse to that this fall–my life had been altered. For the better. I only won MP2 once during that fall semester of 2013, and I probably lost about 24 times. But the one time I won? Yeah, that was a remarkable, improbable victory. I had subbed in for Jordon Hall, and Jhood had been in last place with only about 10 turns left. Well, the rest of the game was nothing short of a miracle. I somehow managed to win the game. We became so invested in MP2 that Young Retti created a journal in his notebook. He jotted down stats and notable acievements. And Mike Arena has to be the best button masher ever. He is like the Michael Phelps of button mashing.
14. Perkins debacle
I’m not even sure where to begin on this one. But basically I like Perkins late night trips. I’m talking 2 or 3 a.m. In late January or early February, five of us went to Perkins. And four of us were drunk. Two of us were really drunk. Moments after entering Perkins, one of us walked into the bathroom and threw up several times on the floor. And then before we left, another person went into the bathroom and threw up several times on the floor. The next week Perkins decided to close at midnight rather than having 24-hour service. Who knows if it was because of the two “unnamed” people… but it might have been because of those two.
13. The Ithaca Savior
I had no idea the moment I met him all of our entire lives would have changed. But Matt Moretti transferred in at the beginning of the Spring 2013 semester, and holy shit I don’t think any of us knew someone could have that big of an impact. At that point, our friends had long been established. We had been friends for three semesters already, and none of us really anticipated any surprises, but Young Retti showed up. Kid’s a great friend of ours now, and yeah he is our Ithaca Savior. Basically our Rasheed Wallace. ‘Sheed was traded to the Pistons at the deadline prior to Motown’s championship over the Lakers. We are Detroit. We are from the 313! I get to be Ben Wallace though.
12. Dan stomps a Beer
This moment best describes Daniel P. Adrat. One late Saturday evening, we had arrived at trippy townhouse to watch a sad doc titled “Dear Zachary.” Several of us had been desperately waiting to see this movie, and most of us had been drunk. It was after midnight. Either Dave or Retti had a beer on the floor. I think it was Retti. But he had to change, so he didn’t get a chance to open the beer. He placed it near the couch, and then Dan decided it would be a great idea to stomp the “empty” can because that is just what drunk or sober Dan does. He stomped the full, non-open beer. Believe it or not, it did explode, splashing throughout the room. I couldn’t stop laughing. Maybe this was one of those “had to be there moments.” But if you know Dan, you shouldn’t be surprised. After all this same kid farted on Diamond in 4th grade on purpose. It might have been in 5th grade… even worse. Go Dan!
11. DURANGO SOUNDTRACK
Wrecking Ball, Hold On, We’re Going Home, I’m Sprung, Treasure, Confessions, Royals, Black Skinhead, Bound 2. Jesus our Savior couldn’t have made a better playlist.
10. Taco Bell
Friday in Fall was created for high school football. You know, Friday night lights. But that wasn’t the case for four college kids. For about 13 Fridays during the Fall Semester (and a Wednesday) Bona’s took on Taco Bell’s happier hour. Dollar grillers. Dollar medium drinks. Making Haikus? Priceless. We did work on those loaded grillers. We even made a friend–a female cashier.
9. 40 Hands
Couldn’t tell the date, but I know it was a Friday. Trippy and Aime took on the 40s. It looked like Retti had the thing down with ease. I mean he finished the first 40 in a few minutes, if that. But somehow, Dave Scott took home the victory in one of the more improbable upsets in the history of competition. I’m talking Giants over Patriots 07 Super Bowl type of upset. Just the idea of Dave winning has me laughing. But props to him. Aime and Mike threw up, and Mike finished in last. Figures, the only two Buffalo kids throw up.
8. Croton Harmon’s birth
Parent’s weekend. Matt’s parents took him to a local sporting goods store. I guess he found seven of the same white jerseys, and he decided to make a purchase. He comes back to the townhouse and gathers everyone in the living room (aside from Dan and Dave.) Well, he gives us each a jersey with Croton Harmon written on the front. It was dope since each jersey had the same design, name and each had a different number. None of us thought anything of the name. We just were stoked to have similar jerseys. Anyway, we show Dave. And he had been in shock. Apparently Dave’s school, Walter Panas in Westchester, NY had a rival named, you guessed it: Croton Harmon. Wow. Same school and all. Craziness. Bonavanture is abut five or so hours from Westchester County. Well, Croton Harmon had been born that September afternoon.
7. Halloween Weekend
Festive weekends are usually great. Each night has it’s own awesomeness. The outfits were the reason why this year’s Halloween was great. Dave and Show Room were The Village People. S/o Connor, Sean, Matt, Christian and David. Mike was Quailman and a pepper. Retti was some rapper. Maybe Chief Keef. I was Ben Wallace. I had the fro and I even spray painted my beard dark. Dan won best costume with his George Washington outfit. We drank some beer that weekend.
6. Metta’s Wild Night
Probably the funniest story of the year. I don’t want to get into details just because of how ratchet Metta’s story really is. I’m surprised he evens remembers some of that epic night.
5. Spring Weekend
Dan shaved his head. Dan got sun burnt. Retti got a mo hawk. Dave Hamill pissed everywhere. Dan and I walked to McDonalds at 5 a.m. Dan hit on a McDonald’s worker with five teeth. Fredo called a girl the c word. I mean this weekend had it all.
4. Fredo cried… more than twice.
3. St. Patrick’s Day Weekend
Ah, yes. My favorite weekend. Always will be. I won’t go into details because I’m not even sure how much I remember.
2. Laser tagging with Ron
We laser tagged with a future president of the United States of America. Like c’mon. Can’t get much better than that.
1. I can’t even explain
This story is by far the most ratchet I’ve ever encounter. I can’t even begin to write about it. Those of you who know… well, you know.
Happy New Year!